Cat Theft - Not a Victimless Crime

For me 2022 went out with a bit of a Fuck You.  Some scumbags stole my Cat

Catalytic converter theft is a growing problem

According to farsight blog over 16,383 catalytic converter theft incidents were recorded in the first 7 months of the 2021, that's an average of 2,340 cats being pinched every month!  I am not one to play the victim and despite being fully insured, my car was written off as an uneconomic repair.  Which is all well and good, but there is still a financial impact to the unlucky owner in the unplanned purchase of a new vehicle.

Turn Adveristy into an RPG Plot Hook

I have to stay positive and think of a way I can turn this adversity into a positive.  How about a plot hook for a Judge Dredd game.  Enter nefarious music producer Simon Power.

He has been working on putting together a super-group girl band called Kat Kitten and the Power Converters and he just hasn't been able to get their sound right.  None of the band can sing worth a lick but he stumbled on a rare psychometric study which postulated that a cats meow at the right frequency has a psychotropic effect akin to mind control.  His plan is to add this mysterious M note to the band's song "Don't Stop By Me Now"  

His backroom boffins have isolated the particular cat's meow that he needs to fill his lineup and has despatched teams of audio analysts to track down the right cat for the job.  They have been prowling the streets of MC-1 secretly recording pet cats and passing on the owners details to a a gang of catnappers.

Catastrophe

These pet pinching perpetrators have been getting away scott free until one particular owner catches them in the act and tries to prevent her moggy from getting manhandled and she falls to her death from her apartment balcony.

Jocelyn Wildenstein / Mr. Blofeldt
Ugly Competitor / Pet Cat

The victim is one Jocelyn Wildenstein, a famous ugly pageant winner and the owner of a prize winning pedigree pussy named Mr. Blofelt who just so happens to have the magical meow that Simon Power is desperately searching for.  Needless to say the cat is missing.

Ms Wildenstein's death has escalated the case of the missing moggies to a capital crime and the Judges will need to enlist the aid of Tek Division best to trawl through the hundreds of cases and thousands of hours of video footage to find the connection between the victims.  Or MAC can do the same job in about 6 hours.

The cats are all different species but the one thing that they have in common is their meows are all within a particular frequency.  

Having a Psi judge in your patrol squad will be useful when reviewing any vid footage of the missing cats.

As a backdrop to this plot hook the holo ads have been running thick and fast in the last couple of days promoting the release of the debut single from Kat Kitten and the Power Converters.

Some Potential Encounters

Record Store Riots - If the Judges don't get the connection before the release of the single, it will be fairly obvious that something is untoward is going on when the record stores run out of copies of the single due to its immense popularity.  Riots break out between crazed fans of the band as they storm record stores.

Live Concert Catatonic Conversion - Kat Kitten are appearing at an open air concert playing the B-Side of their single "Stop the World I Wanna Get Off" when the crowd suddenly go catatonic.  Reports start coming in over the air waves of mass reports of muteness among the population.  

Pop Mogul Protection - A baying mob attacks Elton John Luxy Apts the home of Simon Power and he needs to be rescued.  Attending his apartment, eagle eyed members of the patrol will notice the odd white hair laying on the sofa.  A search of the apartment will find a stash of synthi-cat food (Mr Blofelt's favourite flavour Liver and Tripe) in his kitchen.  Power will of course claim that he doesn't have a cat at all and that this is part of his diet regimen and even eat the cat food to prove it.  

Power keeps his secret musical weapon close and caged in a secret closet in his bedroom.  A member of the patrol with an allergy flaw, exceptional hearing or a Psi Judge will be sensitive to the cat's presence.  Of course if Power is subjected to cross examination with a birdie lie detector he will eventually crack.

Rounding up the Catnappers - Powers will give up the name of the gang he hired to steal the cats.  The Eartha Kitt Krew are an all female gang of catburglers who specialise in high rise heists using jet packs, skysurf boards, bat-suits, climbing gear and sucker knee pads.  

Their turf is in the lower levels of Adam West Block. They won't come quietly and are particularly adept at Martial Arts and also protected by a contingent of well armed heavies from neighbouring gang the Robinhoods out of Burt Ward Block.

Helter Skelter - To Paint or Not to Paint

In an earlier article about Judge Dredd Boardgames, I hinted that I had prayed to the eBay Gods to send me a copy of Judge Dredd: Helter Skelter.  

 Well the Gods answered and now it is in my boardgame collection.

20 Plastic Miniatures in Need of Some Colour

So should I do it? Should I paint these up?  Tell me in the comments box below.

Starblazer: Small Format Science Fiction Adventures

I've blogged before about my love of the Starblazer Adventures RPG system which was inspired by the small format single story comic books published by DC Thomson Comics in the 1980s.

Small Size but Big Thrills

Starblazer was never as popular as it's war story cousins Commando and Battle and I know as a kid they were hard to come by in 1980s Bradford.  In fact I seem to remember there being one news kiosk in the bus depot that used to carry them in one of those wire racks for birthday cards.  Isn't it strange what you remember.

DC Thomson had started publishing collections of these long out of print gems, but after 2 volumes the faith seems to have departed.  Not to worry, I have a small collection of these thrill packed little comicbooks and they are still readily available on eBay at very reasonable prices. 

#18 Abandon Earth - Space Wars did not exist.  By a series of treaties each galaxy remained alone and untouched.  Earth built a survey shi, Zephyrus, to prospect in deep space.  It was this ship that led to the call - "Abandon Earth".

In this tale of human humbris, the arrival of the Zephyrus in Vemlin space is interpreted as an invasion and gives rise to an intergalactic war with Earth.  The inexplicably named Carstairs is the robotic hero in this odd tale of politics and miltary strategy.

The cover art is reminiscent of the spaceship paintings of Chriss Foss, Peter Elson and Jim Burns which are gloriously immortalised in the Terran Trade Authority Books published by The Hamlyn Group in the late 70s.  I remember getting one of these coffee table books as a child and they were like nitromethane for the imagination.

#76 The Mind of Meredith Morgan - Benjamin Starr was a teacher - A man who knew nothing of the mysteries of space travel.  Yet, when a simple accident brought him to the attention of the World Council, he found himself at the controls of a starship, pitting his wits against and alien computer, and warping space itself - and if he failed, Earth was doomed to an eternal Hell.

A rollercoaster of a tale which pretty much sums up a standard Starblazer storyline.  Heavy on the cliffhangers, bouncing from one near catastrophe to another a breakneck speed.  There's no time for an indepth discussion or detailed character motivations, its a swift punch to the jaw and a laser blast from the hip.  

The Starblazer Adventures RPG echoes this with it's hilarious random Starblazer Comic Title Generator.  Honestly, I could just spend a couple of hours happily rolling up different scenarios an imagining what might appear on the cover.   

#77 Fortress of Fear - The key to space travel, was the system of wormholes througout the galaxy.  As they were so far away, defence posts had to be constructed.  Operatives from Earth's elite fighting scientist branch, The Fi-Sci's, were put in charge of their construction.  Danger was a part of their lives , but even their brand of courage was put to the test by the... Fortress of Fear.

In this issue we follow the exploits of Hadron Halley (what a zarjaz futuristic name) as he explores the mysterious planet which is home to the even more mysterious Mind Lords.  

These cut price Mekon-like maniacal mentalists have subjugated the native population and turned them into puppets dressed like the Oz's Tin man (I kid you not).  They hide in the safety of their mushroom shaped city come spaceship and finalise their plans for Solar galactic domination.  

Elements of the artwork remind me of Simon Harrison's Bradley the Sprog but in classic fashion DC Thomson never cited who wrote or inked their comic books.  

#160 The Last Days of Earth -  It is 2500 AD, and Earth is protected by Earthwarriors - A select band of highly skilled fighters.  A mission starts on Picture 1 and progressively becomes more and more difficult... It is at this point that your help is needed to make vital decisions.  Read on... unless you succeed you will witness... The Last Days of Earth.

A cheeky subtitle change to "Space role-playing game in pictures" announces that DC Thomson have  jumped on the Fighting Fantasy style adventure gamebook in this story of post apocalyptic survival.  You are Space Patrolman Svenson .  I can't remember ever seeing anything as ambitious as this in comic book form although the Ace of Aces Game Books from Flying Buffalo.

Needless to say the adventure is a pretty ripsnorting affair with Svenson bouncing from one death defying panel to another before ending up in court.  I think this deserves a proper playthrough and mapping of the choice tree so I can work out what the hell is going on in this story arc.

#174 The Terminator - Lawlessness abounded in the pioneer outer worlds of the Earth Federation, and the few over-worked, short lived Marshals attempted to stem the criminal tide.  Assisted by huge, deadly robotic terminators, justice slowly began to return to the colony worlds... Until one of these gigantic, unstoppable machines turned rogue and proceeded to eliminate innocent people.

It's 1986 and clearly James Cameron's lawyers thought it wasn't worth suing DC Thomson over the title of this issue.  This has all the hallmarks of a classic western story where up to no good town officials are lining their pockets with some scheme involving the mine.  Enter Marshall Skarr (God, I love these names) who is sent to Glasis V to investigate.  He gets straight to the bottom of things and stirs up trouble for the local Judge who programs a Terminator to exterminate Skarr before he really finds out what is going on.  

The Judge has done a deal with the Ellon, who basically are starfishmen, and not the cuddly Patrick kind these are more like Zygons.  The Terminator gets its second wind and helps rescue Skarr and everyone lives happily ever after.  The robot is a pretty cool design and lives up to its description as an unstoppable relentless agent of justice.

#180 Eden the Hunter - Made an outcast because his mistake had caused the death of fellow villagers, Eden swore vengeance.  The only trouble was - he didn't know what he was fighting.

The depiction of Eden on the front cover is a bit misleading and clearly someone must have copied a picture of Kurt Russell as once you turn the page he looks more like a Native American Indian tribesman.  

This is such a weird story and the sort of techno savagery story you used to get in science fiction back in the 80s.  As the story evolves the villains of the piece are introduced, a race of electro vampires that look like a cross between a human and a pteradactyl.  Eden encounters various people along the way all of whom seem to have fallen prey to the electro vampires but Eden is a rugged outdoorsman and not to be trifled with. 

The electro vampires reminded me of one of the character Worzel from the excelent Lensman anime movie.  A highly recommended adaptation of the E.E Doc Smith, Hugo Award nominated Lensman books from the 1950s.

#182 - Bron The Avenger - After the Nuclear Wars devastated Earth, civilisation ceased to exist as we know it.  Murderous bands roamed the country taking what they wanted, but the hand of fate selected Bron to stand against them.  A young man with strength in his limbs, and revenge in his heart.

Well from that description Bron sounds like a lot of fun.  Starblazer didn't just do Sci-fi with spaceships and aliens, there was a healthy smattering of fantasy and crossover post apocalyptic mad max style adventure too.  Bron is one of those sword and sorcery tales set in the ruins of 1980s civilization.

The scent of anachronism is heavy and at one point Bron delves into the subterranean underworld chased by zombies and finds himself on a runaway tube train.  This theme runs throughout, the idea that some technology survives, hoarded by the "sorcerors" and technomancers with the knowledge and skill to keep the machines alive and working for their own benefit or that of their overlords.  

#186 Starhawk - The 3rd Millenium, 2600 AD, and the Galaxy spanning Terran Empire is crumbling in decline.  The savage Krell ravaging its borders and order is replaced with choas.  Barbarism exists everywhere, and amid this lawless bedlam one man stands for law and order - Sol Rynn, known as Starhawk. 

This is a return to the square jawed smoke me a kipper type hero who roams the spacelanes like a one man A-Team.  His calling card, quite literally a card you push into a machine to make a call, reads "If your cause is just, but the odds are too great Use Me".  I'm suprised he gets any business at all with approach.

Somone on Wengel IV needs his help, but the first locals he encounters practically ignore him.  Fortunately he finds the terminal used to make the call in an abandoned communications centre.  Enter the Battletoads style mutants who chase Starhawk through the jungle.  Eventually he discovers the secret lab of Hak Galos the owner of Megalos Mining who has hatched a nefarious scheme to mine Trikalak K a banned substance and key ingedient in Quark bombs.  Galos clearly has some sort of plan for those quark bombs, but it is never fully fleshed out.   

Want to Know More?

I found a great resource with some fantastic interviews from some of the original artists and writers who worked for DC Thomson back in the day.  Check it out at downthetubes.net.

The Great Human vs AI Challenge

Did you know that it is almost 25 years since Skynet became self aware?  I thought I would test whether or not the old girl was still up to snuff.

The Challenge

Play 10 games of Race For The galaxy on my iPad whilst I am walking up in the morning (see I'm already finding reasons why I lose), log all the win scores and then crunch the numbers in excel.

The Ultimate Challenge - Race for the Galaxy

Only completed games are recorded and there is no quitting except in the event of a game crash (it happens surprisingly often).  The AIs are set on Hard and play uses all the expansions available (New Worlds, Gathering Storm, Rebels vs Imperium and Brink of War).

 

It will be interesting to know if any patterns emerge among the AIs and whether or not my win rate improves as I play more games.

 

I have done this challenge before in the first lockdown and despite playing 1000 games I only managed a 25% win rate which is probably the same as the random chance score in an ESP Test.

Race for the Galaxy The RPG?

Unlike other CCGs like Magic the Gathering, R4TG has no  flavour text on the cards despite the huge potential to do so contained within the theme. 

If you are active on Instagram check out @r4tg_2022 which is one person's personal project to add a narrative roleplaying element as he plays the game.

Score So Far

As I write this I am 1 week into the challenge with 70 games completed.  Scores on the doors please George Dawes!

 

• AI 1 - Strongest player Win Rate: 37%, Average Score: 47.5, Average Win Score: 60.5
  
  
• AI 2 - 3rd strongest player: 25.7%, Average Score: 42.3, Average Win Score: 53.9
  
  
• AI 3 - 2nd strongest player - Win Rate:30%, Average Score: 45.7, Average Win Score: 43.4
   
• Me - Weakest player - Win Rate: 12.9%, Average Score: 38.1, Average Win Score: 62.8  

The average score per game is 43.4 but the average score to win a game is 58.0 which means that AI 2 and AI 3 are winning with much lower than average scores.

Galactic Council Report

What a diabolical start to the challenge. Lets hope that my play improves considerably going forward.

 

One Year On - Dragons Keep Roleplay Club

It's 2022 and the COVID-19 debacle rages on.  One of the casualties of the Coronavirus pandemic was my old club.  The pandemic was a catalyst for division and greatly reduced attendance as fear and panic spread across the membership, it ceased to function in any meaningful way.

Pulling the Plug

This club had been founded on the principles of democracy, every member having an equal say in how the club was run.  Unfortunately this led to internal politics when most members just wanted to turn up, play games and have fun.  Running that club became a constant battle of personalities, skullduggery and in-fighting.  The pandemic was a cover story for usurpers to spread rumour, lies and deceit in private channels in order to facilitate a popular uprising.  

Unfortunately, the patient was considered to be unsaveable and the tough decision to pull the plug had to be made.  This enabled the membership to ultimately make their own decisions about how they wanted to roleplay going forward.  The club was dead, long live the new club.

Sacrifice

Running a club is a thankless task and I have played my small part in helping to run numerous roleplaying clubs over the last 30 years.  The problems are diverse but mainly revolve around organising games so that everyone has something to play.  Clubs evolve organically, expanding and retreating as the winds of fortune blow and the real-life priorities of members compete for their valuable time and energy.

It takes a certain amount of sacrifice to run a club and a management team that can commit to doing what the club needs rather than what they need as a player or a games master for the good of the group.

I have learned a hard lesson in that a club is not a democracy.  Democracy empowers people with a voice and a platform upon which to speak their opinions.  However, without effective rules, governance and constitutional principles it can easily turn to Anarchy.  For a club to thrive it has to have strong leadership and direction, it has to have doers and not talkers, because ideas are ten a penny and talk is cheap.  A thriving club is one where everyone is engaged and they want to come to enjoy themselve and not to talk about politics or how they could run things better if only they had a chance.

Green Shoots of Recovery 

January of 2021 saw the birth of a new club, Dragons Keep Roleplay Club, founded by a small group of 6 people with the core principle of "being excellent to each other" and fostering engagement.    The management team run things for the benefit of members and the members only duty is to make sure that they and their fellow players are engaged and enjoying themselves.
 

One Year Later

I am happy to say that we have exploded in size and the membership has swelled to  around 25 members and every one of them turning up every Friday night.  We have gone from an online only existence, playing our first games during lockdown via Zoom and Roll20 to being once again an IRL club with 5 different games on offer.

We hosted our first Games Day and Christmas Party which was very well attended by members and a huge amount of games were played, turkey consumed and sprouts scowled at.  

 

 

We have produced a stable funding platform to guarantee our future.  We now have a merch store so that members can digitally pay their subs and help to fund the club through their purchases, a website which punches well above it's weight, a management team who understands what the members want and actively make that happen.

 

I am proud to say that we have created a space where people can put their work-a-day worries aside and for 4 hours escape to worlds of wonder safe in the knowledge that the people around them have their best intentions at heart. 

However, the most important thing is that this club is full of excellent people who are the most engaged bunch of players and gamesmasters that I have ever had the pleasure to call my friends.  Here is a toast to the future and the roads we will journey together.

Fellow Dragons... Live long and prosper.