Browsing through YouTube can be a dangerous game, particularly when you find a trove of old Sci-Fi and Fantasy B Movies
Arena (1989)
The story is a simple one our hero Steve Armstrong, (Paul Satterfield) is a young kid with a talent for boxing had dreams of becoming a professional fighter and bought a one way ticket to starstation the home of the biggest fights in the Galaxy, The Arena. A year later his dream is shattered and he spends his days as a short order cook in a fast food joint run by his boss the four armed alien Shorty (Hamilton Camp).
A chance brawl with a customer turns into a job offer from promoter Quinn (Claudia Christian) and a trial in the Arena. However, Steve is the only human in 50 years to fight in the Arena against aliens and he is hopelessly outmatched. Can he face impossible odds and become a contender?
Aliens, so many Aliens
The budget on this movie was pretty slim but they spent it wisely on a cavalcade of monster makeup. It makes the cantena scene in Star Wars look like 2 men and a dog. There is so much variety it really makes you feel like the Galaxy is teeming with alien species of all shapes and sizes.
The downside of this is of course that they spent all the money on monster makeup and next to nothing on writers, special effects, models etc. The list goes on.
The Director in me says "what the hell if I'm making Rocky in Space how much script do I need and this is pretty much what director Peter Manoogian must have though too. He does his best and to be honest there are some great moments, in particular when they do an inventive visual gag based on Shorty's four arms.
Claudia Christian (Ivanova in Bablylon 5) is her usual classy self and Armin Shimerman (Quark in DS9) also does a respectable turn as the henchman Weezil who is aided in his master plan by the duplicitous alien cyborg skull (William Butler). It's worth sticking this one out to see what happens to this guy.
It was Acceptable in the 80s
To be honest this wasn't as bad as the terrible video cover art had me believe. The only truly excrutiating part was having to listen to the truly awful songs of futuristic cabaret star Jade (Shari Shattuck). It's a relatively engaging story if a little cliched as we follow Steve's career reach its climax with the big fight against six time champion Horn (Michael Deak), a drug fuelled half robot half horned devil beast.
Give it a go, there are honestly worse things you can with 90 minutes of your life.
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