Obi What a Disaster!

I confess I am not a fan of Disney Star Wars.  It has been a car crash right from the first sequel movie (with the exception of the Mandalorian and the Book of Boba Fett) and the latest installment continues that fine tradition.

What The Actual Fuck! 

I'm just a jobbing DM okay, but I understand continuity and if you are going to write a story in a well established universe then there are some rules you have to follow or you are going to fuck it up.

1. Don't rewrite canon!

Established events are exactly that ESTABLISHED.  If it happened in a previous story then it must happen again.  If a character says something which ordains a historic set of actions then any prequel story you write must maintain those actions or events.

For example when Leia contacts Obi Wan Kenobi she refers to him as a Jedi who fought alongside my father in the clone wars.  This intimates that she has never met him herself and has only heard about him through the war stories her father told her.  So don't set up a 6 part prequel TV series with the singular premise of finding and rescuing the kidnapped 10 year version of Leia.

Don't worry farm boy, I got this

Another example would be the meeting of Kenobi and Vader aboard the Death Star in A New Hope when Vader tells him that the last time they met he was but the learner and now he is the master.  This clearly refers to their last encounter on Mustafa when Anakin was Kenobi's padawan.  Don't set up a showdown that breaks the canon and can only end in a standoff because you can't kill either of the main characters.

2. Be consistent with your characters!

The mark of an incompetent writer is to set up an event and then to back out of it when they realise that they have written themselves into a plot cul de sac.  They usually hit reverse with some mcguffin of an idea which further compounds their error and highlights their incompetence.

For example in the quarry standoff between Kenobi and Vader the Dark Lord of the Sith uses his considerable power to drag Kenobi around like a ragdoll and put out flames with a wave of his hand.  But when the writer has realised that Kenobi is going to die (which can't happen right) he is suddenly defeated by flames and cannot force grab the droid rescuing Kenobi.  Pathetic writing which isn't even consistent with the events of a few seconds ago.  

Can someone call the firebrigade?

A lesser event but no less irritating occurs when the stormtrooper tells Kenobi to tell them his "long story" as it's a long ride and then no more than three minutes later that's it the stormtroopers are at their destination.  Let's be honest, It wasn't a long story and the stormtroopers were a few miles at best away from their destination.  For God's sake was this written by a 10 year old. 

If you are going to make Obi-Wan a shadow of his former self then at least stay consistent.  When he is confronted by the stormtroopers at the laser gate (oh God, the laser gate...) he instantly turns into John Wick and laser blasts them in seconds despite having a known hatred for "uncivilised" blasters.

You killed my dog mother funsta!!

3. Things don't happen instantly

We know that time is a tricksy thing.  You have to allow a certain amount of time to elapse between establishing a thing and then that thing having a consequence.  Travel between worlds takes time even using hyperspace.  You can't just despatch probe droids one minute and them turn up conveniently in the next scene at exactly the right place.  That my dear writer is a mcguffin.

This was an entirely unnecessary element which only served as the backdrop to a power struggle between the two inquisitors.  Do the garrison on Daiyu not have communication with Inquisitor HQ?  Does the notion of sending a photo not occur to them?

Oh my the force is weak with this one. 

Boardgame Rescue - My Next Project - Warrior Knights

The next in my Rescue Mission series is going to be one of my two copies (if not both) of Games Workshop Warrior Knights circa 1985.

Warrior Knights is a great medieval wargame designed by Derek Carver who alsodesigned Blood Royale which was similarly released by Games Workshop two years later as part of their Bookcase Games range.

I have played Warrior Knights a handful of times but it always stood out as a great game with lots going on for each player both in their turn and in others as you strive to capture cities across the board, wage war and try to put your pretender on the throne.

To Pimp or Not To Pimp

That is the question.  There is limited scope for pimping the game as it comes with a huge amount of cardboard tiles for all manner of item , however, there are some options including:

Strongholds and Cities - The most notable game piece on the board are the stronghold counters which come in three flavours:

• Stronghold - x1 - This is your barons home
  
• City Control Marker - x14 - Some city walls to surround your
  
• Improved Control Marker - x6 -
  

Noble Markers - As you can see from the photo below these generic shields just look cheap and nasty and mine have even changed colour!!

Warrior Knights - Noble pawns, Stronghold and City Control Markers

Money - It makes the world go around and you end up playing with these tiny little tokens throughout the game.  Much better to have some nice plastic tokens that don't blow away if someone coughs.

Warrior Knights - Money - Who has time for 1/2 crowns these days!!

Trade ships - There is an exploration element to the game represented by the 4 colonies in the corners of the board.  These work in the same way as the cities on the main board and can be captured and fought over.  Getting there requires a vote in the council and the ship's progress is represented by a small cardboard counter.  This could easily be replaced by a tiny sailing ship.  

Wish me luck

Movieweek 8 - The Batman

The Batman (2022) - 7/10

I grew up on the caped crusader, not the brooding Dark Knight but the spandex wearing Adam West style Batman.  In the 80s he had a bit of an identity crisis and along came Alan Moore (The Killing Joke) and Frank Miller (The Dark Knight Returns) and rejuvinated him.

This latest outing follows the excellent Gotham TV series and the Ben Affleck movies recasting the bat with Robert Pattinson.  Pattison does his best and excels in the titular role but as Bruce Wayne he fails to be a convincing troubled young man.  Note to Hollywood, stop writing moody men roles, they aren't appealing and frankly I'm bored of them.

The rest of the cast are utterly convincing and there is some great talent on offer with the likes of John Turturro (Carmine Falcone), Jeffrey Wright (James Gordon) and Colin Farrell who is unrecognizeable as the Penguin.  Zoe Kravitz is a very sultry Catwoman but I couldn't help feel that the story failed her character.  Paul Dano had a good turn but the whole mask thing was a total mistake and is far more appropriate to the Joker.

Overall I can see what they were trying to do and I want to like it, I honestly do, but I feel like this was a misstep rather than a triumph.  How this fits into the DCEU (if that is even a thing anymore) or a trilogy of films heavens knows.  I think that they should go back to the Animated Universe archives and mine the Batman Beyond or Batman of the Future stories.  These I would love to see in live action.

Free RPG Day 2022

The dates are confirmed for Free RPG Day 2022 as...

• USA - 25th June 
• Worldwide - 23rd July

You can check your local participating FLGS store on the website https://www.freerpgday.com/   

Freebies Announced

• Goodman Games - https://goodman-games.com/blog/2022/05/27/announcing-our-free-rpg-day-releases-2/
   
  

Jessie's Prints - Episode 17 - Resin is the new Black!

 

This week, I are mostly been printing in resin thanks to me finally summing up the courage to dive deeply into this new technology and buy a resin 3D Printer.  My weapon of choice an Anycubic Photon Mono 4K

Anycubic Photon Cube - Thingiverse 213031

The first print should always be the supplied test print (or perhaps a Benchy) and it took 3 attempts to get this model to print.  Bed levelling or more accurately the distance between the bed and the FEP film appears to be critical when it comes to getting your print to stick to the bed and not the FEP.  I also found an article which recommends that you sand your bed to ensure that it is actually level in the first place.  The center of mine is slightly concave which must have been having an impact on the peelability.

This was actually the first resin model I ever saw printed, many years ago, and thought wow I will have to get me one of those someday...

Cute Mini Octopus - Thingiverse 3495390

I have tried to print one of these before (much larger of course) on my FDM printer with little success.  I guess it has to do with the tolerances involved in squirting hot melted plastic out of a nozzle at 200 degrees celsius.  This one came out bloody lovely and is small enough that he fits on the end of a pencil. 

Sadly, the other models I had on the bed failed to print entirely.  I think this was down to the supports I added in the supplied Photon Workstation not having a thick enough platform to ensure that they made a solid connection to the bed and so they just stuck to the FEP.  I have subsequently read that you can spray your FEP with Teflon PTFE Dry Lubricant to make it slippery.  I will have to get some of that.  

Space Adventurer - Loot Studios Free Miniature

The whole reason for me buying this printer is to print high quality miniatures for tabletop roleplaying games and so I went in search of some presupported miniatures thinking that these would fare much better.  I found Loot Studios who do an excellent bundle for $15 a month.  As this was my first stab at this I plumped for their freebie Space Adventurer who is almost as cool as Oswald the Overladen.

I downloaded the 32mm but scaled him down by 10% as I hate the GW scale and he only came out bloody lovely!!

Down loading this mini convinced me that the problem I am having with my unsupported minis is the crappy supports in the slicer software.  In the same way that I learned the tips and tricks of FDM printing, it will take time to master this new medium and its idiosyncracies.

I'll say this though.  Props to all the guys and girls out there that are busy modelling their own minis and going through the laborious task of adding supports.  They are an absolute must.

 

Next Mission is to paint this little chap and all his little gadgets.